Time out for Women

I had the most AMAZING opportunity to go with some of the most amazing ladies to Time out for Women this last weekend.

We started out our weekend by going to one of my favorites places to eat... Cheese Cake Factory! We did some shopping at our favorite: Brighton Jewelry. My Grammy bought us all a charm for our bracelets to remind us of our fun weekend. Then we headed off to our hotel. We had SO much fun. And we put young girls to shame. It all started with my cousin Mal asking my mom if she could do a cartwheel.

Mal: Linda can you do a cartwheel

My mom: Yes

Mal: can you do a handstand

My mom: no

Me: I CAN (as I jumped up and did one)

Mal: can you do a cartwheel

Me: Yes (as I did one)

My mom: I can too!

and threw her arms in the air. I wish that I could describe how funny this was... but there are no words. She then went into her summer sault. But she psyched herself out and stopped my wheel and fell to the floor

My mom: I strained my arm. (She then tried again. And SUCCESS!)

With that Mal was more determined to do a cartwheel and tried a couple more times. After about a couple of times we heard a knock at the door. My mom ran to the bed. I ran to the bathroom, Grammy and Aunt Lori continued to sit on the beds... leaving Mal to answer the door. A security guard was there at the door. Here is the conversation:

Security guard: is everything ok?

Mal: Yes

Security guard: Oh ok I just wanted to make sure. I heard some pounding noises

Mal: Oh sorry that was my Grandam jumping

Security Guard: I don't think your Grandma can jump

I was then laughing too hard in the bathroom to hear how the conversation ended. After the door was closed, laughter filled our room. My grandma responded, "how does she know that I can't jump?" the laughter grew. The rest of the night we were sure to be quieter. I just love that 5 adult women can still have a good time! 

Saturday morning cam and we were all excited to see what the day would hold, since this was our first time at Time Out For Women. The day was amazing and we were left being spiritually and emotionally fed. My cup was over flowing with new hopes of being a better mom, wife, daughter, friend, cousin, niece, and overall person. My hand was busily writing down notes because I wanted to remember the feeling I had there that day. I wanted to always feel the love that I felt that day from my Heavenly Father and Savior everyday.

Here were my thoughts:

(In my hurried writing I didn't catch all the scripture references and the names of stated some of the quotes)

Theme: Seek The Good

"Seek the good that is already in your life. Reflect on the source of all good" The savior

As I thought about this I realized that too many times I am quick to notice the bad in situations that are not always the best. I learned that we can find good no matter the situation!

"Through his atonement Christ became the high priest of all things good" Jeffrey R. Holland

"And what so ever ye do, do it Heartily..." Colossians 3:23

When I hear this I really started thinking on if I do everything Heartily. 

*Do I treat Rayni and try to be the best mom with my whole heart? 

*Do I do my best at making sure my husband feels loved, important, and cared for with my whole heart?

*Do I always greet everyone with a smile... a smile is the window to your heart, thus, do I show my whole heart with those I come in contact to?

*Am I a good friend and serve in every way that I can or with my whole heart?

*Am I the daughter, sister, granddaughter, cousin, niece, aunt, sister-in-law, daughter-in-law that is always trying to help my family and be there for everyone with my whole heart?  

*Am I the teacher that is making my students feel loved and safe and cared for with my whole heart?  

With all of these listed above there are some that I work at more than others. But I want to do EVERYTHING heartily.

Examples of those that do things heartily:

My mom is always there to listen, to help, to care, and to love! She does motherhood heartily! 

My dad is always there with advice, to serve,, to help, and to smile with! He does fatherhood heartily!

My hubbie is ALWAYS there for me no matter the problem! He does hubbie heartily!

My Rayni is always there to love and to smile. She does Angel heartily!

My Grandma is always there non-judgmentally! She does Grammy heartily!

My mother and father in laws are always there to help us in any way that they can! They do parenthood Heartily!

My sister in law smiles and asks, "How are you today?" to complete strangers. She shows compassion Heartily!

My M's are always there for me when I need a friend or advice. They do best friends and cousins heartily!

I have many more examples in my life of what it means to do something Heartily! I am one lucky girl to have those examples in my life. They are a constant reminder of how I need to be!

"This is your masterpiece" Mercy River

I love this saying! Like all artists they chose how they want their masterpieces to look. They chose the colors, the tools, the type, the time, and the shapes. And their masterpieces usually take a really long time to finish. Like an artists masterpiece our lives are our masterpieces. We get to chose everything about our masterpieces. It is our choice of how we want it to look. There are parts of my masterpieces that have beautiful and bright colors. There are other parts that are dark and ugly. But through my Savior's atonement I have an eraser and can always go back and change what I don't like about my masterpiece. When I am all finished with my masterpiece I want my biggest critic, My Heavenly Father, to look at it and smile!   

Probably one of my most favorite parts was listening to an AMAZING man and his story on forgiveness. I think it was about 6 years ago in February when he and his family were driving home one night and were hit by a teenage drunk driver. His pregnant wife, only daughter, and little boy were killed in the accident. Chris and one of his sons survived the accident. And his teenage son was safe at a friend's house. Chris said that after the impact and the car had stopped he looked over at his wife to see her chest rise with one last breath. But instead of letting hatred enter his heart he said he heard the words:

"Let it go!"  

He knew right then and there that he needed to let go of what had just happened and forgive. This amazed me! If something had happened to my hubbie and sweet baby... I don't know that I could let it go the way he did. It would definitely take some time. But he was able to do it automatically. Chris was serving in the bishopric at the time and when he was in the emergency room another member of the bishopric came and before he could say a word to Chris Chris hurried and said that they needed to forgive him. The friend said, "we don't need to worry about that right now, we need to focus on you and your family." Chris again said, "NO we need to forgive him!...

"We can't fight with the savior when he is trying to save one of his precious souls!"  

Chris has been in contact with the teenage boy that caused the accident. He has been helping this boy to understand the love the savior has for him. This man is "trying to be like Jesus" heartily! 

He then continued to talk about his journey and gave some great words of wisdom:

"When you let go of what happened you feel the love the savior has for that person"

"It starts with us~our faith in the Savior"

"What burden can you lay at the foot of the Lord and allow him to take it and heal you?"

There have been so many opportunities in my life where I have had the opportunity to forgive. On some I have been quick to forgive, on others I was a bit slower, and there are some that I am still working on. Listening to Chris' story helped me see that if he was able to forgive on something that is SO tragic SO quickly, I NEED to forgive on the things that are so small in comparison to his situation! 

Just recently I read from the blog of someone that I look up to so much! And amazing mom of triplets and a rambunctious boy. Who in her crazy life has time to self reflect, work on her relationship with her savior, and be an amazing mom. 

"I learned that I was only able to find the kind of peace that I was seeking by forgiving first. And it was true. I only found peace once I made that decision to forgive and all that comes along with that. To remember my favorite things about this person; my favorite memories; happiest times...to completely and deeply cherish everything I loved about this person and remember everything that our Father in Heaven loves about this person. I got more than just peace. I gained a deeper love for this person." Jessica Hunt 

Amen Lady Lou! When I read this is brought tears to my eyes. It made me think of all those times that I was not quick to forgive or I have not done so yet. I want to love as the savior loves. And forgive as the Savior forgives. 

"Everyday the savior is chipping away what we don't need. I'm under construction.Everyday I'm close to who I'm going to be. This is me under construction. Mercy River

As mom's I think that too many times we put ourselves under a microscope! We compare ourselves to all the other great mom's out there. At least I know I do. I am too hard on myself at times. If I make a mistake I dwell on it and have a pity party. When really I shouldn't feel bad for myself but rather the people that my short comings affected. I need to realize that I am not perfect. My laundry is not always going to be done, my dishes are not always going to get clean, Rayni might not get a bath when I want her to, I may not look like I want to for the day, my house may look like a tornado hit it. But instead of getting stressed out about what I didn't do and effecting the people around me with my stress I need to prioritize and recognize what is the most important. I am not saying this as an excuse to not try to make my house Heavenly. I still should do my best to make it comfortable and welcoming for visitors and the spirit. This quote from one of their songs made me realize that the savior is constantly helping us get rid of things that we don't need in our lives: bad habits, addictions, mean words,  negative behaviors, shortcomings, imperfections, etc. Everyday we are closer to who we are supposed to be. everyday we are being molded and shaped to the kings and queens we are destined to be. 

Every time Mercy River sang a song one of them would share a story that would tie in one of their songs they were about to sing. One of them told a story about a trip that they had taken. It was her, her husband, and thier 9 month old. Thier baby was crawling and playing with a hanger. He fell and the hanger went in his mouth and got stuck. They ended up in the emergency room. It took a long time for them to get it out. She said that this was not what they were planning or hoping for on their vacation. It could be said that their vacation was ruined! But instead of looking at the negative she told us about the positive things that happened. She said that there were sweet moments that her baby only wanted her to make her feel better. That only her singing would make him feel better. Keeping her hand on his cheek would only make him feel better. 

As I listened to this story I couldn't help but think back on the vacation that my hubbie and I had just had with our 9 month old. I am not going to go into details on this post about that vacation (I will in another one) but lets just say it was not the vacation that we were planning or hoping for. We had a very sick baby! It was very frustrating and we did not always have the most patience with our little Lou! After hearing this story I started thinking that my hubbie and I really needed to stop focusing on the negative and how awful severl moments of our vacation were. But instead look at the positive. There were times that she only wanted her mommy. There were times that only my singing would clam her down. There were times that my touch would only make her happy. Now that I look  back on it these were precious moments and tender moments that my Savior had given to me midst the nerve-racking time we were having. 

After she told her story she said: 

"Just like my son he only wanted his mommy to make him feel better... How do you think it makes the savior feel when all we need/want his him to make us feel better?

"Look at the little moments the savior sends out way to give us hope"

After she said this I had moved on from thinking about my own story and started focusing on the tender moments that the Savior sends to me when I seem to need them the most:

*My Papa Syd loved everything about nature. There were specific things that he liked though like Canadian Honker Geese.Whenever I see them in the sky or am in my house and I hear them it always makes me think of him. Rayni (well not quite yet) and I say, "Hi Papa Syd!" whenever we see or hear them. I love their sight and their noise. It always seems to come when I need it most. 

*My kids in my class always seem to know just when to ask for a hug, or to give a kind word, or to give a tender touch on my back, or to laugh their laughs or smile their smiles that I love so much! I can be having the worst day, and I say a little prayer in my heart for some help. Then it seems to be the kids are always right there to jump on it and give me that little help that I need. 

*I can be sad with tears flowing or just not happy and my Rayni seems to always know when to give me a sweet smile or even touch my tears with her little hands. This melts my heart! 

*My hubbie is always there for me. He seems to know when I just need to go sit down sometimes. And he will be there to step on it when I need it most.

These are moments that I am so grateful for every day!

"Has anybody told you youre beautiful? you might agree if you could see what I see. Everything about you is incredible. You should have seen me smile the day I made you!" Mercy River

Growing up I had bad self image issues. I never felt good enough. I never felt pretty enough. Hearing the statement above, "You should have seen me smile the day I made you!" really tugged on a heart string. Because it made me think of how I smiled when I first met my Little Rayni Lou. I thought she was the prettiest thing I had ever seen. She is one of her Father in heaven's masterpiece... but she is also my greatest masterpiece! Her daddy and I made her. I had so much love for that little girl, it is hard to believe but I know that my love for my baby is a fraction of the love that the Savior and Heavenly Father have for each one of us. My Father in heaven made me just the way he wanted to make me. In his own image... for me to say or think that I am not pretty enough is like me saying that directly to him. I need to respect his masterpiece. Yes there are days that I don't feel so materpieceish but on those days I just need to remember my feelings for my Rayni and that will remind me of my Heavenly Father's feelings for me. 

I hope that one day when Rayni is reading this she will know how BEAUTIFUL she is!!!

Next to speak were two blogging moms Kate and Sara. They were so good at bringing motherhood into the right kind of light. Too many times do we look on pintrest or facebook and see everything that we are not doing. It makes us look at all the things we are doing wrong... but we forget to look at all that we are doing right. I think that too many times we put such high expectations on ourselves and we don't notice the little things that are happening around us. 

One of them stated that they don't remember the big elaborate parties that their mom threw, but they remember the little things like playing "who can match the socks the fastest" game. 

"Enjoy the little things because one day they will be the big things"

They also talked about what things you can do to be a better mom, not according to what pintrest says you should be doing but what the Savior wants us to do. 

"look at the word mother as a verb. Mother's love nurture and serve"

Next speaker was Bradly Wilcox. His talk was one of my favorites! His talk was about Names. He went into detail of what each one of the Savior's names meant. My favorite one was:

Jesus' name means "God is help"

Through Our savior's sacrifice we received help from our Father in heaven. Such a big sacrifice from both the Savior and Heavenly Father to be willing to love us that much!

"The savior is the king of kings and the king of Queens."

"On the days that we don't feel like a Queen- just remember that as we know the savior's name he knows our name- his queen"

"the saviors goal is not to get us to heaven but to make us heavenly"

"God loves us the way we are but we need to be thankful that he does not leave us like this. He's not done with us yet, remember that when you aren't feeling queenly"

"A covenant is not a cold agreement between party A and B. It is a warm promise between friends on a first name basis. When we renew our covenants we are not taking his name upon us he is giving it to us."

"When we partake of the sacrament close your eyes and think that the savior is signing across our heart "Jesus of Nazareth is making this just as Michael Angelo signed his masterpiece the "Pieta""

I truly had the most amazing time. My spiritual cup was overflowing. I made new promises with myself to be a better wife, mother, daughter, and friend. 

I am so grateful for the many many blessing that my Father in Heaven and My savior have blessed with me. 

Rayni: I hope that when life gets you down you will open to this page and remember who loves you... Me, your daddy, you grandparents, your family, and your Heavenly Father and Savior.