On December 8th I got a call from Rayni's babysitter...she told me that Rayni had been throwing up and that I needed to come and get her. Zach and I were going to be leaving the very next day for Mexico. And, well, Rayni has a track record of getting sick whenever we go on vacation. I was beginning to panic. I was so excited to be getting away with my hubbie...but not thrilled about leaving the country when my baby was sick. I knew that Rayni was going to be in good hands with my cousin, Brooke, while we were away. So I bucked up got us all packed hugged and kissed my baby to death before we got on that airplane. I tried not to worry, I tried to listen to everyone that she was in good hands and that there was nothing I could do, I tried to just be in the moment in Mexico. But a part of me was always thinking about my Rayni. Rayni did ok while we were gone...she had a day where she was totally fine and was able to hold things down. Then the next day she would not do so well and throw up. My sister in law Mandy thought it would be a good idea if she took Rayni for the last few days that we were gone since she had kids and that might be able to distract Rayni from being sick and hopefully get her feeling better.
Zach and I had a wonderful time in Mexico! But when Sunday night came and my head hit the pillow I was ready to be home and be with my sweet girl. After a very restful night Zach woke me up by saying, "oh crap!" I immediately said, "WHAT?!?!" he was looking at his phone and not answering me. So I thought maybe I should look at my phone. I had like 20 missed calls and texts and a missed call on skype from my brother in law who was in Afghanistan. My first thought was something happeded to a family memeber. Then I read one of the texts from Mandy that said she had taken Rayni to the ER and that we needed to call her. I did not have free calling on my phone so I text my dad and said, "I need you to come and unlock the door and bring me your phone right now!" (we were staying in a separate cabin from my parents) By the time I got to his door he was coming down the stairs with phone in hand. He opened the door and I started crying, "Rayni is in the ER" I tried to dial Mandy's number but my hands were shaking so bad...of course as a mother the worst is going through my mind! After many failed attempts I dialed correctly and heard my sister in law on the other end, "Everythings ok! We are home. Rayni had a little problem but we got it taken care of!" she then went on to explain that Rayni started crying in the middle of the night and she went in to check on her. Rayni said her tummy hurt, like she had been saying all week. Mandy took the blanket off of her and saw that her stomach was very descended. She called her brother who was a paramedic and asked what he thought. And he told her to take her in right away. When they got there they did some blood work and an xray and thought to have seen a blocked bowel. They put a tube down her nose to suck out the blockage. I was told that she was so brave! She handled the uncomfortable procedure like a champ. And after they got the tube in Rayni told them that they could take it out now! Bless her heart!
I was relieved that she was ok but now I just really needed to get home to her. Luckily our flight was not too late. My sister in law met us at our house Monday night when we got home and you can bet the major snuggles and hugs started! I am so grateful to my 2 sister in laws, mother in law, and my cousin for all they did to help make Rayni as comfortable as they could!
With Rayni not quite out of the woods yet Zach and I decided that we needed to keep Rayni home the next 2 days to make sure that she is able to keep food down and get back to normal. Tuesday she did pretty good. Held all her food down and had a follow up appointment. Wednesday my niece Michelle watched her the first half of the day and Zach came home for the second. She was acting like her old self and seemed that she would be ok to go back ot daycare the next day.
Thursday morning I was in the kitchen and Zach went in to wake rayni up only to find that she had thrown up all over her bed and her self. I quickly got her up and in the tubbie to get her all cleaned up. I was beginning to panick because I had 3 meetings that day that were not ones that could be eaily missed. Rayni began to throw up over and over. Zach and I were on the phone trying to find anyone to help us because we had both already missed so much work between our week long vacation and her being sick. We didn't know what we needed to do but we needed someone to help us while we figured that out. My brother Tate aka Bubba drove down from SLC and came to our rescue. I left for work in a mess because all I wanted to do was be with my baby. Zach was on the phone with a doctor's nurse trying to figure out what to do. But left for work because we still were not sure. After Zach got to work a lady he works with came up and told him that the same thing happened to her and she almost died from it so she said he should get her up to Primary Children's hospital. The only problem was that they were months out for appointments so the quickest way in was through the ER and hope she gets admitted. Zach quickly drove back home had my brother drive him and Rayni up there and then I would be up there as soon as I was done with my meetings.
That was one of the longest days of my life. literally holding my phone all day waiting for updates and praying for news that she would get admitted so that they could do some real testing on her. Right before my last meeting Zach called me and said that she was being put in the RTU unit for observation over night. YAY! I was so glad that they weren't just going to send her home. And hoping then that we would get some answers. I finished my last meeting and went straight up there. When I got there my sister- in-law Lina, my dad, and Zach were in the room. (Later I found out that her aunt lina had not left her side. I was so grateful that she was there as a mother figure when I couldn't be there at that moment)
I heard my dad say, "there she is!" and Rayni immediately started crying reaching for my and saying,"mama!" zach jumped up and reminded me that I needed to stay calm! I held back my tears and was right there in bed with her to hold her so tight! She was hooked up to an IV and watching her favorite movie Frozen. I remembered that I grabbed her Lamby and pulled it out of my bag and handed it to her. She quickly smashed and rubbed her face in it like she always does. And got a half smile on her face.
Right after I got there I met the nurse...got a pink bracelet with Rayni's info and was asked a bunch of different questions.
As I was getting asked the questions my good friend Mary, from work, came in with her daughter paige to give rayni a dumbo stuffed animal and book. Rayni was a little out of it and not able to express how much she loved it but I was so grateful that Mary had driven all that way to give my sweet Lou something to love while she was there for the night. This was just one of the many blessing we received through this adventure. Before my brother and dad left Zach and them all joined in a circle around my little baby and gave her a beautiful blessing! I felt so much comfort and love in that room. I was so grateful that those 3 men were worthy priesthood holders and could use their power at that time!
After a ot of tests the RTU team came to the conclusion that Rayni got a GI virus that caused her intestines to have Ileus, which is a slowing down of her intestines. This is why she kept throwing up because her intestines were not doing their job making everything move through her very slow. Her intestines could not keep up with everything and that is why she kept throwing up. They slowly started putting her on liquids and then soft foods by Friday morning. and slowly decreasing her IV fluids.
in the late morning she got taken off of her IV and talk started about going home. After seeing her nurse for what we thought was the last time I noticed her stomach starting to descend again. I called the nurse back in and she agreed with me. She thought that if we got her walking and moving that maybe it would help get things going. The DR also took a look and thought the same thing and wanted to see what would happen after lunch. The 3 of us went to the third floor where we heard they had an amazing play room. And it was! Rayni was having a blast. After playing for a bit we took her back to her room. When we were walking back we went into an elevator where a girl, in her early teens, and her mom. She had a little conversation with Rayni. She looked like she was someone that knew the place well and we assumed she had been there for a while. As we were walking out Rayni said in her sweet angelic voice, "merry Christmas!" zach and I immediately had tears in our eyes. Rayni was not in the most ideal of circumstances but she was still thinking of others! Such a great example! When we got back to the room she had some mac and cheese. Her stomach then began to go down and things were looking really good. They told us that this might be common for a bit but if it happens let her walk and play and keep soft foods going and everything should work out. The next day they wanted us to have a follow up appointment with her pediatrician. Gave us instructions about soft foods and to watch for blood in her stool and vomit. And to call or bring her back if she threw up 5-6 times.
We left there with smiles on our faces that we were going home! We wer so worried that we were going to have to stay another night! But after 2 uncomfortable beds and waking up every two hours while the nurses came in to check on her were were ready for our own comfy beds.
Rayni fell asleep on the way home, refused to wake up when we got home, then refused to wake up around 4, and slept till about 6:30 that night. Exhausted little thing! We had some great friends, Brooke and Darin Bell, bring us some dinner. Then all of us went to bed!
As Zach and I layed in bed we thought about how lucky we are to be back home in our beds when there are so many children and their families that have to spend so much time there! It truely made us feel so grateful for the blessings we had recieved...and hopeful hearts that Lou was going to get better.
That next day, Saturday, Rayni had thrown up a little twice that morning and we went to Ranyi's follow up appointment. They wanted to do another xray just to make sure that everything was still ok in there. They discovered that Rayni was completely backed up and that she would need to have some help for a while to keep things going. The Dr asked if she could to a rectal exam and take some more blood to test levels. Rayni used to love going to the Drs and didn't mind shots. But now when she sees a the caddy that the nurses carry with them to draw blood she immediately goes into panic mode ever since getting her IV in the er twice now! Daddy sat there with her trying to keep her clam while they drew some blood while mama sat in the corner in tears because it was just breaking my heart. Then the poor thing had to have her bum looked at. So uncomfortable! After she was done and had a sucker life was looking better. We were sent home with instructions to give her some enemas to see if that keeps things moving and do another follow up appointment on Tuesday. Latter that night we went to a family Christmas party. We thought running and moving around and being with family would help her out physically and mentally. Went home had to do a lovely enema and went to bed. Rayni did not love it the first time. But the next day when we had to do it again she had us both in tears by her screaming! She didn't know what to expect the first time but the second time she knew and was not happy about it. We did get her to poop and we were so happy thinking ok...this is it things are going to be normal. I was home for Christmas break now so we were in full force operation get Rayni better. Monday morning Rayni and I tried to do some low key fun things and keeping her diet really soft. She did really well till about 5:30 at night and she started throwing up. I called my mom in tears saying that I just want her to get better. We were on 2 weeks of rayni throwing up now. And I knew that there was something else wrong! After I hung up wit my mom Rayni started throwing up over and over. When we reached 6 times we called the er at primary's like we were told to do, the nurse on the other end said to bring her back in. I called my mom in tears again not wanting to do this all over but asking them if they would meet us off of their freeway exit and take us there, because Zach couldn't miss any more work. Of course my parents jumped into action and were right there ready to help us. When we met them off the freeway I was in tears because I didn't want to go without Zach. Zach was in tears because he didn't want to not be by Rayni's side. My mom was in tears because she could see how all of us were in pain and exhausted. We said our tearful goodbyes and were once again off to the er for Rayni's third time. I was determined to not get an answer that this was just a GI virus that needed to work it's way out of her system. Obviously there was something else going on. We got all checked in and were waiting to be taken back. Once we got back there I had to retell the story to a nurse, a dr, and the dr that saw her the last time she was there. His answer was, "we can do 2 things: send you home and just let it work it's way through or have you go back into the RTU unit and try again with IV and slowly decreasing her food intake since it seems like she did pretty good with that." I was not happy with those options! I very politely said, "I really feel like there is something else going on. And yes she did good with the IV when we were here but that is not what is helping her when we are home." I don't want to just try the same thing. He agreed and said that he thought it would be good to have her admitted into the main hospital and have a GI dr take a look at her in the morning. I was relieved that we weren't just going to send her home again. Rayni then had to be put back on an IV, get some more xrays, and we had to wait for a pretty long time before a bed was ready for us in the hospital. My parents stayed with us till about 12:30 at night. Poppi blew bubbles with her and Grammy Lou let her put on her "lips". They were so great to be there to support us and to help me keep Rayni happy.
At about 1:30 they finally got us a room and took us upstairs. The nurses were great! They got us both situated and comfortable. We then had a Dr come in to do an exam and hear the story...AGAIN! Luckily he typed it all down so anyone else that comes to see her can just read her chart and be up to date. He again said that we would be seeing another dr in the morning and a gi specialist. Rayni slept through the night. I got a call fomr Zach at 6:30 that he had been up sick all night throwing up so was missing work anyways. But this killed me because I couldn't be in two places at once taking care of my babies! But he assured me that he was ok and to just worry about Rayni. Right after that call the Dr came in to see her. He talked to me saying that the GI virus was a nasty one that has been going around and that it really just needs to move out of her system. He wanted to do the iv and slowly add the food and test her liver. And that he also felt that a GI specialist was not necessary! In my exhaustion I excepted this answer and called zach to let him know what he said. Zach brought me back to reality and told me that I needed to tell him that there needs to be something more. Because obviously this was not working...to just let it make its way out. Our daughter had lost so much weight, that she never really had any to lose, and had been pale since the day she started throwing up. I Went out of Rayni's room and luckily the dr was still there. I told him that after thinking about it I was frustrated with his answer because of all that has happened and her physical state. I also said that we were told she could see a GI specialets and that if he was just going to do the same thing as the RTU unit then he needed to move us back down there because it was a difference between 200$ and 1000$ between the two units. He was very nice and calm and explained that the only thing a GI specialist could do that he couldn't was a scope and he knew that they wouldn't because of how young she was and the complications it could cause. He agreed to do more testing than just her liver and maybe consult with the GI specialists. I felt better with that answer.
Rayni was immediately put into test after test. The worst one, that I will never forget, was a swallow test (for lack of the medical term for it) where she swallows a dye and they watch it on an xray screen to see how it moves through her body. They were hoping that she was just going to suck the dye through a sippie. But Rayni was not having that. So they had to put it in a huge syringe and practically shove it down her throat. The radiologist warned me that it was going to get messy and not be fun for her at all. He told me to be tough and try to talk her through it. People I am telling you that this is the hardest thing I had to see Rayni go through. They had to pin her arms and legs down and shove this thing down her throat and try to swallow. They had to get a big enough mass in her mouth to be able to see it on the screen. Between her swallowing and screaming she kept looking and me with her big blue eyes filled with huge tears telling me she was done and wanted to go home. It took everything in me not to grab her and run out of that room so fast! It was about 20 minutes of pure torture for my sweet girl. All I could tell her was be tough!
But I stayed strong and just talked her through it. During the test the radiologist said that the dr had ordered the test to watch what happens to the dye when it enters into her small intestine. But that he was not able to do so because her stomach was not emptying the liquid. I said, "well maybe that's the problem". He said that he thinks I am right. After they were finished they wanted to wait 5 minutes and then take just one last picture of her rested stomach. I couldn't take her off of the table but she was able to sit up. I had her hug her lamby so tight and then I wrapped my arms around her and whispered to her as I rocked, "baaaby baaaby" Something that I have always done since she was a born. The tech that was helping told me, "good job mama! you got her to calm down!" I whispered to him... I wish she would stay this little forever so that I could always rock her. He then told me not to blink. I was saying a silent prayer as I continued to rock her thanking my heavenly father for giving me strength to stay strong. And to giving me the chance to be a mommy, and to give me the ability to clam her down. They took one more picture and I got to finally hold her.
The nurse was walking us back to our room when down the hall I saw a familiar face. One of my dad's best friend's wife. She volunteers there on Tuesdays and I was so relieved to see her. I didn't think she would recognize us because we were one hot mess. But she did and offered the biggest smile. Her sweet voice saying hi to Rayni and saying that she was so sorry we were there. I put rayni over my other shoulder, away from sight of my face, and freely let the tears flow. I don't know what it was about seeing her. But seeing her smile and hearing her sweet voice after the ordeal Rayni had just been through made me feel so loved that the tears just started flowing. I couldn't speak but I think Sara knew and just rubbed my shoulder and we departed. The nurse left Rayni and I in the room to rest. I held my baby so tight and rocked her as she quickly fell asleep. Out of all that she has been through that was the most hardest, miserable, exhausting thing she had to do! I hated seeing her go through it, I don't want to ever see her go through anything like that again, and I wish that no one has to see their baby in misery like that. I watched my baby sleep, watched her eyelashes flutter as she dreamed, and felt her belly move steady on my chest as she slept. I wanted to hold her safe against me forever. I wanted to take all her pain away! I wanted to never let her go!. This procedure was HELL! But has also left a huge impression on my heart of the feelings I had at that moment.
After about a hour of rocking Rayni I decided to lay her down to ensure that she would get a good nap in. Right after I layed her down my dad showed up. He told me to go take a break and get some lunch. I left the room, got some lunch, and came back...my dad was sitting next to Rayni just gently rubbing her head. My dad has always been my big teddy bear. Here is the man sitting next to this tiny little thing with his big hands just gently rubbing her her head was enough to melt my butter. He sat there next to her side for about an hour. I was grateful he got that time with her. And I was grateful to have that time with him also. When he left he told me he would be back after work. Then gave me one of his big bear hugs. Since Rayni has been sick, when I saw my dad, his hugs were bigger and lasted a little longer. There were days that I wanted to just stay in his hug and not face the reality of what was happening. I hated to see my baby in pain and being in his hug made me feel better if only for just a moment. I think every girl longs to always be their daddy's little girl and there were small moments in this trial that I felt like my daddy's little girl and that, like when I was little, he was going to make everything ok. I am so grateful for my dad and his strength when I felt so weak!
After a few more hours the Dr came in and told me that he and the GI docs looked at her "swallow" test and discovered that Rayni stomach had been weakened from the GI virus and stopped emptying into her intestines. This is the reason why she kept throwing up. She would eat and it wouldn't empty so she would eat again and it would eventually reach it's limit and have to empty somehow...thus throwing up. Him and the GI specialists felt that the best thing for her would be to put her on a medication for 10 days that would force her stomach to empty. The idea behind it was that the medicine would do the work for her so that her stomach could take the rest it needs in order to heal and get back to work. I felt so good about this answer and this was the first time I felt comfortable with the answer we were getting. It made total sense. I was so grateful that the answer had finally been fond. Since Rayni has been on the medication, for 3 days, we have already seen such a huge difference! She is keeping down her food and POOPING! we have never been so happy to see poop in our lives! But it is true that a happy dance is done whenever we see it!
Like I said before I hated going through this and seeing my baby go through this but there were glimpses of miracles, of love, of amazing sacrifices, and answered prayers. It has only been 3 days...but the progress we have seen so far is keeping our hopes high! And to hear Rayni say, "I'm not sick anymore huh mom? I feel better!" is priceless!
We were so blessed to be home for Christmas to be with Family!
We are so grateful for all the love and prayers we have received from family and friends from Doctors and nurses. If there was ever any questions before...it is very apparent that this little girl is extremely loved both on earth and in heaven.
So that's the story! I learned so much! I love this little girl even more when I thought I loved her as much as I could! I learned to rely on people when it wasn't so easy, I learned to trust others with my daughters life, I learned to trust my heavenly father, I learned that my Savior really knew how she felt in her pain and how we felt seeing her in that pain, I learned how much more love I have for certain family members, I learned that everything will work out even if it is not our idea of how it should be, and I learned how truely blessed I am to have an eternal family! I am grateful for my hubbie who was my rock and held me up! And I am grateful for all of those that were right there ready and willing to help in any way that they could. And I am so grateful for the amounts of prayers that were said on Rayni's behalf!
We 3 are so blessed to have so many loved ones!
Zach and I are truly so blessed to be in the presence of such an amazing heavenly little being!
